Does your partner frequently make promises to change something when you confront them about it, but they never actually follow through? Is there a confusing inconsistency in your relationship that feels ongoing but is difficult to describe and happens so often that it’s hard to remember specific instances? Or, perhaps you find yourself in a…
It’s often said that “clarifying the issues” is key to resolving healthy conflict. If mature, communication is critical to a good relationship, then constantly confusing conversations without resolve is the catalyst to an unhealthy one. When a person regularly uses stonewalling to avoid authentic communication, it often causes confusion and obstructs meaningful communication and connection.…
Choosing to seek couple’s counseling once the abuser has thoroughly worked through their issues is one of the most challenging and courageous things you can do for your relationship while you consider reconciling. Couple’s counseling with an expert therapist that confronts abuse and its dynamics and the occasional setbacks and successes can be extremely beneficial…
For couples experiencing relationship issues that they can’t seem to solve on their own, seeking marital counseling is often the expected next step to take. However, while couple’s counseling has been proven to do great, transformative work among many, it is not the solution to every relational problem. Here’s what you need to consider when…
Last week on the blog, we described ways in which some individuals spiritually abuse their partners. But spiritual abuse is not simply an issue between couples— institutional spiritual abuse can occur within any faith-based or religious organization. It can happen at the hands of leaders of organizations or within their congregation between members of community…
Religious and spiritual leaders when well trained can offer valuable support to victims. Spiritual leaders and authority figures can also inadvertently or intentionally wield spiritual abuse. We are going to talk about institutional spiritual abuse in our next blog. This week however we will address how spiritual abuse can also occur in relationships as a…
We are all first responders at some point in our lives. We are mothers, fathers, siblings, professionals, and friends. As a first responder to abuse, at some point, you will likely face the opportunity to confront a person about their abusive personality and behavior. Whether the abuser is a client, co-worker, family member, or friend,…
Deciding whether and how to leave an abusive relationship may be the toughest choice an abuse victim makes in their life. Every situation is complicated by different variables, and it is not uncommon for the victim to stay in their abusive situation longer than their loved ones would expect them to as a result of…
In last week’s blog, we addressed some reasons why women don’t leave their abusers. The M3ND Project has been in dialogue with a number of male victims to listen to their stories of abuse and wanted to share some of the reasons why men might not leave their abusers. We have been told about the…
“Why don’t you just leave him?” Many people ask victims of abuse this question. Although it is often posed with good intentions, it is rarely a helpful question to ask. For most victims, the decision of whether to leave a relationship is far more complicated and wrought with nuances than most people realize. In this…
