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The Mend Project
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The Mend ProjectThe Mend Project
  • About
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    • Our History
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  • Victims + Survivors
    • You Are Not Crazy
      • List of Unhealthy Behaviors You Might Be Facing
      • I Look Like The Crazy One
    • It’s Not Your Fault
      • Original Abuse
      • Glossary of Terms
      • Domestic Abuse
      • Couple’s Therapy
      • Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
      • Should I Stay or Should I Go?
    • You Are Not Alone
  • Responding to Abuse
    • How Can I Know if it’s Abuse?
      • The Victim
      • The Abuser
    • What is My Role?
      • DOUBLE ABUSE®
      • Complex PTSD
      • Prevent PTSD into C-PTSD
      • Note to Faith-Based Organizations
  • Training + Curriculum
  • Tools + Resources
  • Get Involved
  • About
    • Contact
    • Our History
    • Our Team
  • Victims + Survivors
    • You Are Not Crazy
      • List of Unhealthy Behaviors You Might Be Facing
      • I Look Like The Crazy One
    • It’s Not Your Fault
      • Original Abuse
      • Glossary of Terms
      • Domestic Abuse
      • Couple’s Therapy
      • Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
      • Should I Stay or Should I Go?
    • You Are Not Alone
  • Responding to Abuse
    • How Can I Know if it’s Abuse?
      • The Victim
      • The Abuser
    • What is My Role?
      • DOUBLE ABUSE®
      • Complex PTSD
      • Prevent PTSD into C-PTSD
      • Note to Faith-Based Organizations
  • Training + Curriculum
  • Tools + Resources
  • Get Involved

Category Archives: Stories

Joy in the Morning: Ada’s Story

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectMay 19, 2022Leave a comment

“‘There will be joy in the morning,’ she said as she prayed for me one day. “Joy in the morning.” After the pain, hurt and grieving I’d been feeling for so long, this was music to my ears. But it was much more than that as I felt a sudden shift within me responding to…

A Reflection on 2021

Blog, News, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectDecember 30, 2021Leave a comment

With the New Year upon us, our team has been reflecting on all we are grateful for through this past year. For many, 2021 may have mixed reviews…uncertainty, loss, change. For others, it promulgated significant transformation and growth. Whatever 2021 brought to you, we hope you find peace, joy and healing as you begin 2022…

Why Don’t You Believe Me?: Phillip’s Story

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectOctober 19, 20212 Comments

Phillip spent years trying to figure out why he felt like a slave. “It must be due to my childhood. That’s why I struggle so.” He saw a therapist. Tried to get help. He defended his wife; thought she was his only support. Until one day,  the revelation of what was going on hit him…

Emotional Abuse is still Abuse by: Joy Newsome

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectSeptember 22, 20211 Comment

Today’s blog is a story from a brave survivor who courageously shares her story. Survivor stories can be healing and validating for those who are within or have been in an abusive relationship. They are essential for survivors to share. But they also can be very hard to hear; sometimes, we can become triggered by…

I am the 1 in 7: The Story of a Male Victim of Abuse, By Tom

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectAugust 18, 2021Leave a comment

Today, we are sharing a story from a victim that highlights not only how tormenting Covert Emotional Abuse can be, but how being a male victim abused by a woman can be a uniquely difficult and isolating situation. Like many other male victims, Tom endured years of maltreatment, both physical and emotional, before he found…

My Earliest Memories Were of Abuse, by Nicole

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectJuly 20, 2021Leave a comment

I experienced unfathomable abuse as a child. Now that I have children of my own, I’ve had to face the darkness in my past all over again.

The Not So Just Justice System: By Valerie

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectJune 9, 20212 Comments

In this week’s blog, we share a story submitted on our website by “Valerie” (not her real name). Valerie’s journey through the family court system might sound extreme to some of you, but it’s not. We at The M3ND Project hear so many stories of adult victims of abuse who lose custody of their children…

Robbed of a Childhood: An Adult Child Overcoming Abuse From A Narcissistic Mother

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectMay 6, 20213 Comments

In last week’s blog, we shared what it is like to grow up with a parent who is a narcissistic abuser. We shared the struggles victims have in understanding the abuse they endured and in finding healthy relationships as adults and how they instead commonly find themselves repeating the abuse cycle within their relationships. Often,…

The Wreckage He Left Behind: Crystal’s Story

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectMarch 18, 20215 Comments

Today, we are sharing a story from a brave woman, named Crystal (a pseudonym to protect her privacy). In abuse cases, victims often say that the covert emotional abuse was much worse than any other form of violence that occurred. It is common that the honeymoon phase Crystal experienced in the beginning happens before the…

Why will no one believe us? The story of Male Victims of Abuse: By Craig

Blog, StoriesBy The M3ND ProjectFebruary 13, 2021Leave a comment

Craig’s story reminds us…men can be victims of abuse. Like women, they find themselves in sexually, emotionally, or physically abusive relationships. But coming out about the abuse for a man is exceedingly difficult as you will see from Craig’s story. Although he experienced physical, sexual and covert emotional abuse by his wife, when he disclosed…

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Disclaimer: The author of this website, Annette Oltmans, takes responsibility for the presentation of the content of this website. I am not a clinician. I am a researcher and your helpmate. I am not trying to vilify any gender or any person. I am not diagnosing nor am I trying to punish those who harm others. My mission is to identify and clarify the single behaviors or patterns of behaviors that occur when covert abuse is present. Statistically, women are more likely to be the victims and are also more likely to be aware that problems exist, but that is not exclusively so. In the service of all victims and those who harm them, I offer this information.

I am not affiliated with HWP, MyTime Active or The M.E.N.D. program (Mind, Exercise, Nutrition, Do it!).
© 2021 The MEND Project. All Rights Reserved.

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