Without a doubt, we are all facing unique challenges during this COVID-19 pandemic. We recognize that this season can be especially difficult for victims of abuse, particularly those who are still living with their abuser. If this is you, The M3ND Project wants to be a light for you by providing hope and some simple steps you can take to help freshen your perspective and lift your spirits. For those of you who are first responders in a victim’s life, we ask you to make a special effort to remember those who have been abused and to offer your support at this time.
Because of the COVID-19 quarantine, abuse survivors are facing unprecedented challenges as their health and wellness are now subject to weeks of quarantine at home and social distancing. For some, this might mean they are unable to work and risk losing the outlet and income work provides. Still, others are living in confined quarters with their abuser (who also is home far more often than before), unable to get the respite that work, errands, or the daily pace of life had previously provided. The added strain any or all of these conditions place upon victims threatens to further compromise what might be an already-weakened immune system due to extreme stress the past or present abuse caused on their mind and body.
We realize there is fear and anxiety for every victim in the known and unknown that has come to define this time. For victims, you might feel exceedingly lonely, overwhelmed or scared. Although many of us may feel this way, these feelings can go much deeper for someone who is in a traumatized state. Abuse survivors might find themselves stuck in uncertain or unsafe situations without a support system leading to further pain, trauma, and isolation. Even though we are told staying at home is the best thing for the world, this can feel like the worst thing a victim can do. If this is you, we want you to know that our hearts are with you, and we want to encourage you to find ways to maintain your personal emotional, mental and physical health.
Below are a few ideas and action steps you can take to care for yourself during the COVID-19 outbreak and beyond. Consider prioritizing self-care through the following ways:
1. Engage in a Grounding Activity
To be grounded means to “feel balanced.” Grounding is particularly important when we reach high levels of anxiety and our thoughts race uncontrollably. When this happens, it can feel impossible to slow things down or to feel in control. Grounding activities can help you distance yourself from overwhelming thoughts, decrease anxiety, and slow your mind and body down. They will allow you to engage in your own rest, relaxation, and recharge. We recommend engaging in gently stimulating activities such as yoga or going for a walk outside. Physical touch is an important part of grounding: put your hands in cool or warm water and think about how it makes you feel. Sit down, stand, walk, or run and notice what it feels like to touch the ground, or chair or other object. Or try listening to music or the sounds in nature and pay attention to how the sounds feel to your ears. These actions can calm your brain and body helping you return to healthy (and grounded) thoughts and feelings.
2. Do Something for the Community
One of the best ways to build up self-esteem and respect for ourselves is by giving back to others. Serving others is a great way to take our eyes off our own suffering and bring light to another’s path. If you are not in a position to serve others right now, it is okay. Serving others can be done in a way that brings self-healing and provides some respite from our own hardships. Most importantly, it reminds us we are not alone. Consider making grocery runs for the elderly or a neighbor in need, donate food to a local non-profit, share your finances with someone who just lost their job or has been unemployed, or give encouraging cards, gift baskets, or even home-cooked food to your public servants. These are just a few ideas for you to consider if you have the energy and resources available to help.
3. Speak Life Into Yourself
With so much bad news being circulated every day it’s easy to be influenced by those negative sentiments that are around us. As a result, we go through our days feeling down, anxious, and discouraged. It’s important for you to take action so you won’t remain in a destructive and stressful headspace. We can combat this adverse mindset by taking in and putting out positivity through the practice of speaking life and truth to ourselves. There is power in our words, especially the ones we speak to, about and over ourselves. You can begin by saying a list of affirmations to yourself in the mirror every day. “I am worthy. Worthy of love, worthy of safety, worthy of peace. I am loveable and loving.” If you are not used to doing this, it can be very hard to do at first. You may not believe the words, or you might even feel silly. Yet, when your brain hears the positive words being spoken aloud, there is a shift within the brain and the positive declarations can defeat the negative emotions. Be sure to repeat this exercise and say it aloud, so the words have greater impact. When you find yourself thinking a negative thought or saying something particularly harsh or cruel to yourself, counteract the negative thoughts with positive declarations about yourself. If you are struggling to find the words to build yourself up, go through the list of affirmations you have for yourself. Cultivating this practice now could help to build a life-changing, life-giving habit.
We know self-care at this time will look different for everyone. We encourage you to use this time to build yourself up emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually. We are here to help you. If you are looking for further support during this difficult time email us at info@themendproject.com or send us a direct message via Facebook or Instagram.
Take good care of yourselves! Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
The Mend Project team.
